okay

Is it just me? Is it just me who lashes out when they mean to do the opposite. Who pushes away when they want to be held? Who gets angry when they are really just sad? B has stayed behind in South Africa for a month. I said I was okay with it, because I am. But I’m also not. I hate him not being here. I joke that I never signed up to be a single mom, and it is a joke. Sort of. I am better at everything when he is here. I am okay with it because I now know I can cope with most things I may have to encounter. I am okay with it, because we need me to be. And I will make the most of it, as will he. And I will find the moments to remind me of how blessed I am, how blessed we are, and it will be okay. But just for tonight I’ll blame extended jet lag, late nights, sunday night blues, not speaking to B for a while for my sadness, and for me being tired of having to be okay.

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2 thoughts on “okay

  1. Yip it will be okay……….but hey it is also okay to feel not okay…..so don’y beat yourself up ………be as okay with that as with the knowledge that it will all be okay. Because the inner you being is seriously okay! x

  2. From facebook

    Kerry Solomon, Lesley Oliver and 2 others like this.

    Leanne Angel Braithwaite You are the most authentic person I have ever met. Thank you for your honesty and reminding us all that is ok to be real. To feel, to, love, to be envious, to be angry, to regret. Because all those emotions make us beautiful, alive souls, finding their way in this beautiful world. I feel the same about my husband. I know exactly how you feel. Have a happy Monday! Xxxxx
    April 29 at 10:06pm via mobile · like · 1

    Susie Pitts You clearly need to beat the shit out of a tennis ball… Tomorrow 8.45.
    April 29 at 10:09pm via mobile · Unlike · 1

    Lianne Cawood Thanks Leanne, and amazing how things immediately feel better when you know you’re not alone! And how much better things seem in the morning!!! Hey Sus … you are so right …. see you in the am!!!! xx
    April 29 at 10:37pm · Like

    Kerry Solomon Things also seem better once we’ve vented, so good on you for sharing. And thank you once again, because in revealing your truths you make us all feel comfortable with ours.
    April 29 at 10:50pm · Like

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